MILK RUN Scene 18 v1 The Brig (beat notes)

Here are the “story beats” for a brand-new chapter/scene, called “The Brig” that explores what happens to Captain Toby Louis while in the brig.  Here’s a quick background.

The USS Princeton is under attack from the Telrachnid gunship.  It feels like the USS Princeton is being cut up to pieces and our hero, Captain Toby Louis, has ordered the ship to cease fire hoping his ex-fiancé, Smriti, in the gunship will convince the Telrachnids to also cease fire.   But (second in command) Commander John Emerson wants to continue the fight and countermands Toby’s command then orders the security guards to remove Toby from the bridge.   Toby and the commander go back and forth at each other trying to get the crew to follow their lead as the USS Princeton continues to disintegrate. Commander Emerson eventually succeeds in taking over the ship and has Captain Louis placed in the ship’s brig.

And here’s what happens next in the form of story beats- simple one or two line sentences that describe what will be written as shown below:

  1. Toby’s thoughts and fears while in the brig  
  2. Stockton still unconscious
  3. Dr. Susan Connors visits Toby on orders from Emerson to determine if Toby has been compromised by the Telrachnids
  4. Susan challenges Toby on his strategy/desire to bring Smriti back to the USS Princeton
  5. Toby’s Telrachnid test comes back negative from Dr. Connors
  6. Some crew members visit Toby and tell him that USS Princeton has resumed its journey to Star Base 21 to deliver the “Crowbar.  They offer their support to retake the ship but Toby refuses saying a divided ship and crew will surely result in a failed mission
  7. Emerson (and his security guards) visits Toby in the brig. 
  8. Emerson grumbles about not being able to contact SpaceComm since they are about five times the distance to Proxima Centauri.  It would take over 21 years for their radio signal to reach Earth.
  9. Toby challenges Emerson on why he things Toby is compromised by the Telrachnids
  10. Emerson reveals that he has seen Toby’s SpaceComm training files saying his current behavior and decision making is inconsistent with the records of a “top of the class” graduating captain.
  11. Toby reminds Emerson of his “Strategic Imperative” privileges that he used to take advantage of new information and opportunities while over 21 lightyears from SpaceComm.  Emerson reveals that he never liked SpaceComm’s “Strategic Imperative” concept.  To which Toby reminds Emerson, that is probably another reason why he did not get to sit in the captain’s chair.
  12. Toby warns him that that the Telrachnids will certainly dog the USS Princeton all the way to the secret star base, something that must be prevented.
  13. They argue over which is the right course of action (kept brief)
  14. Emerson leaves undeterred by Toby
  15. Fearing Emerson’s plan will both expose the location of Star Base 21 and fail to deliver the Crowbar and along with his inability to persuade Emerson, Toby doubts his ability to command and influence a ship’s crew

My writing process for creating new content (or major rewrites) starts off with these beats. If I like it, then I grow, refine, then weave those beats together to become a full narrative complete with dialog and action.  

Want to become a beta reader for MILK RUN? You can easily join our merry crew by clicking this StoryOrigin link here.  You will then be able to read and comment. Thanks!

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